What Is Going On?!
Back to my quick story. It was as I was slipping off my shoes that it hit me, or rather the warmth did. Warmth? On a cold day? Inside my apartment? Nuh uh, my apartment doesn't do that. In fact, my apartment seems to be in blatant competition with the outdoors: if the day's cold, then my apartment has to knock its internal temperature down to a level amenable to frostbite. In the dead of winter, my apartment could double as a transitional base camp for those about to embark on an Antarctic expedition.
Naturally, I panicked at the foreign desire to take off my coat. First, I dashed to the stove, certain that there I would find a roaring blaze that would demystify the alarmingly comfortable degree of heat within my home. Nope, my burners were quiet and a wee bit dirty, just as I'd left them. I then dashed about my home, but there just aren't that many sources of heat in this place--huh, don't I know it. I wondered if I'd been walking too fast and merely woken up my inner furnace. But then my eyes were drawn to the windows: blurred, top to bottom, with condensation.
Okay, now I was scared. You know in that movie where the room suddenly gets really cold and you watch a layer of frost swiftly creep over everything, and then you know the monster or big baddie has arrived? Well, okay, this is nothing like that, but... This just isn't normal. Nice. But not the natural order of things.
Something's wrong, I just know it. But what? Where is all this good ambient warmth coming from? Aaaaarrrgh!